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Chayei Sarah

Sarah’s life
“Life and Death Matters”

Genesis 23:1-25:18
1 Kings 1:1-31

excerpted from TorahScope, Volume I

This week, we begin our Torah reading with some very perplexing verses,

“Sarah lived one hundred twenty-seven years. This was the length of Sarah’s life. Sarah died in Kiriath Arba (also called Hebron), in the land of Canaan. Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for her. Abraham rose up from before his dead…” (Genesis 23:1-3a, WMB).

When you begin to read the Torah portion Chayei Sarah, you are immediately struck with the oddity that although this text is named the “life of Sarah,” it is not a summation of the life Sarah lived, but is instead a record of the post-mortem activities of Abraham and his entourage. Little mention is actually made of Sarah’s life, but what follows of her life is a testament to the relationship which existed between the principal Patriarch and Matriarch of our faith. Abraham’s obvious grief is described along with his determination to bury her in the Promised Land.[1] Once Sarah is laid to rest, the focus turned to securing an appropriate wife for Isaac, the son of promise who was born to Abraham and Sarah in their waning years. The reading concludes with additional information about Abraham’s remarriage, and his final 38 years prior to his death at the age of 175.[2]

While contemplating these passages about our spiritual forbearers, a number of thoughts came to my mind. After all, it was a sovereign act of the Creator to choose Abraham and Sarah to be the couple from which the nation of Israel would be birthed. What was it about their lives which is so instructional for us today? What can we learn from this parashah which we can impart to our children and to other young people, so that they will follow in the faithfulness of Abraham and Sarah? In considering these questions, we will discover that when reminiscing about future deaths, we are reminded that how we choose to live our life really does matter.

One Flesh

Most of us recall how it was Abram who was called out of Ur to sojourn in the Land of Canaan (Genesis 12:1). But do we remember that at the time of his calling, he was already married to Sarai and that she too was a part of that same calling?

“Abram and Nahor married wives. The name of Abram’s wife was Sarai, and the name of Nahor’s wife was Milcah, the daughter of Haran, who was also the father of Iscah. Sarai was barren. She had no child. Terah took Abram his son, Lot the son of Haran, his son’s son, and Sarai his daughter-in-law, his son Abram’s wife. They went from Ur-Kasdim, to go into the land of Canaan. They came to Haran and lived there” (Genesis 11:29-31, WMB).

It may seem insignificant to consider how Abram was already married to Sarai at the time of his calling by God, but the fact remains that he was. It is also mentioned that at the time of their departure from Ur, it was already common knowledge that Sarai was barren. She was not producing any offspring or heirs for Abram, but when the time came to depart for Haran, she was among the group which traveled north up the Euphrates River. Often, as was customary in ancient cultures, barren women were set aside or abandoned if they were not producing heirs. But Abram and Sarai appear to have had a relationship which transcended the societal pressures imposed by the lack of progeny. There was something very essential about their relationship which prompted the Creator to chose them to be the first Hebrews to “cross over” the river from the old country (Genesis 14:13).

Millennia later, we can read the oracles of the Prophet Isaiah, as he described not only the call given to Abram, but also the oneness which existed between the two progenitors of our faith:

“Listen to me, you who follow after righteousness, you who seek the LORD. Look to the rock you were cut from, and to the quarry you were dug from. Look to Abraham your father, and to Sarah who bore you; for when he was but one I called him, I blessed him, and made him many. For the LORD has comforted Zion. He has comforted all her waste places, and has made her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of the LORD. Joy and gladness will be found in them, thanksgiving, and the voice of melody” (Isaiah 51:1-3, WMB).

YLT renders Isaiah 51:2 with, “For—one—I have called him, and I bless him, and multiply him.”[3] When you consider the description asserted by Isaiah, it claims that Abraham and Sarah were “one” when Abram was originally called. In the Biblical understanding of marriage, the two had become basar echad “one flesh,” as stated in Genesis 2:24: “Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will join with his wife, and they will be one flesh” (WMB).

When Abram was called out of Ur, he was already “one flesh” with his wife Sarai. They exemplified the relationship which God had established in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve, experienced some degree of mutual respect, and they no doubt loved one another deeply. A man and a woman becoming one flesh is referred to later by the Apostle Paul to be a “mystery,” which in and of itself, represents the relationship between Yeshua and the ekklēsia:

“[S]ubjecting yourselves to one another in the fear of Messiah. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Messiah also is the head of the assembly, being himself the savior of the body. But as the assembly is subject to Messiah, so let the wives also be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, even as Messiah also loved the assembly and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the assembly to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without defect. Even so husbands also ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself. For no man ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, even as the Lord also does the assembly, because we are members of his body, of his flesh and bones. ‘For this cause a man will leave his father and mother and will be joined to his wife. Then the two will become one flesh [Genesis 2:24].’ This mystery is great, but I speak concerning Messiah and the assembly. Nevertheless each of you must also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see that she respects her husband” (Ephesians 5:21-33, WMB).

It was imperative that the Lord choose a couple exemplifying the essence of oneness, to be the foundation of the one true faith—because ultimately such oneness is elementary to understanding how He relates to His people, and now His people relate to one another in mutual submission. Therefore, it is to the lives and faithfulness of Abraham and Sarah which we, their spiritual descendants, should look.

As we look at the lives of Abraham and Sarah, it is clear that he loved her very much. Even during the trials and tests of Abraham’s life, there is an underlying knowledge that a true loving partnership existed between these two, called out to be the forbearers of our faith. Whether it was departing together from Haran,[4] dealing with the famine in Canaan,[5] migrating to Egypt,[6] conniving Pharaoh,[7] separating from and then rescuing Lot,[8] getting ahead of God’s plan for an heir,[9] or waiting on the promises of a physical heir[10]—it appears that Abraham and Sarah were ultimately able to come into agreement as “one flesh” throughout their lives.

Of course, we always think about the faith of Abraham, who has been commonly labeled the father of our faith (Romans 4:12), and a friend of God (James 2:23). Little mention is made of the faith exhibited by Sarah, and yet, she also is listed among the faithful in the Hebrews 11 “Hall of Fame of faith”:

“By faith even Sarah herself received power to conceive, and she bore a child when she was past age, since she counted him faithful who had promised. Therefore as many as the stars of the sky in multitude, and as innumerable as the sand which is by the sea shore [Genesis 15:15; 22:17], were fathered by one man, and him as good as dead” (Hebrews 11:11-12, WMB).

Here, Sarah was noted as one who faithfully considered the Holy One as willing and able to complete the promises He made regarding the birth of a physical heir. When you couple this with the many more references to Abraham’s faith throughout the Scriptures, you can see that the faith component of Abraham and Sarah’s life together was mutually shared. They epitomized and exemplified the awesome power of a husband and wife working faithfully as one flesh, to accomplish what God had called them to do.

Sarah Laid to Rest

When Sarah died and it came time to lay her body to rest, the grieving Abraham secured a gravesite for her near Hebron. Through the years of sojourning and various encounters with the Almighty, Abraham was absolutely convinced that he and his descendants would be given the land promised to them. He did not even consider burying Sarah in any other place than the Land of Canaan. He inherently knew that it was critical for Sarah to be buried in the land promised to them and their descendants after them.

We read that he actually purchased a cave at Machpelah, so that there would never be an argument that the land was not deeded or owned by him (Genesis 23). This is reminiscent of an oath Abram made with the Lord years earlier regarding accepting anything from the inhabitants of the Land of Canaan:

“Abram said to the king of Sodom, ‘I have lifted up my hand to the LORD, God Most High, possessor of heaven and earth, that I will not take a thread nor a sandal strap nor anything that is yours, lest you should say, “I have made Abram rich.” I will accept nothing from you except that which the young men have eaten, and the portion of the men who went with me: Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre. Let them take their portion’” (Genesis 14:22-24, WMB).

The scene took place as the transaction for a burial cave was completed with honor, and Abraham reflected the character of a man who would not just take anything for convenience’s sake.

A Wife for Isaac

In his advanced years, having observed the ways of the Canaanite peoples, Abraham knew that in order to give his son Isaac the best possible chance of maintaining a proper relationship with the Lord, it was imperative that he locate a wife for him. The best choice for a wife would not be among the native women. Abraham decided that he would send his servant Eliezer back to the Land of Haran to find a suitable wife for Isaac:

“Abraham was old, and well advanced in age. The LORD had blessed Abraham in all things. Abraham said to his servant, the elder of his house, who ruled over all that he had, ‘Please put your hand under my thigh. I will make you swear by the LORD, the God of heaven and the God of the earth, that you shall not take a wife for my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I live. But you shall go to my country, and to my relatives, and take a wife for my son Isaac’” (Genesis 24:1-4, WMB).

Abraham knew the special “one flesh” relationship he had with Sarah. He understood the importance of becoming one flesh with his wife. He intrinsically knew that the chances of becoming one flesh were greatly improved if you found a mate who had a similar background and upbringing. As he surveyed the Canaanite field around him, he concluded that his son could best find someone like his mother among those from his own ethnic and social background. He commissioned Eliezer with an oath to find a wife from the women in Haran, who came from his family who still lived in the region. At this time in his life, Abraham was faithfully confident that the Lord was going to send an angel ahead of his servant to find a wife for Isaac:

“Abraham said to him, ‘Beware that you don’t bring my son there again. The LORD, the God of heaven—who took me from my father’s house, and from the land of my birth, who spoke to me, and who swore to me, saying, “I will give this land to your offspring”—he will send his angel before you, and you shall take a wife for my son from there’” (Genesis 24:6-7, WMB).

This statement is evidence of Abraham’s great faith in his God. Later we discover, at the end of this parashah, that Abraham’s faith is rewarded as Rebekah returned with Eliezer and became the wife of Isaac. We are told that Isaac, the son of the promise, was greatly comforted by her appearance and his consequent marriage to her:

“Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife. He loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death” (Genesis 24:67, WMB).

Here, the cycle of love and faith was restored as Isaac and Rebekah carried on the “one flesh” tradition of Abraham and Sarah. Another great love story unfolded, as they also became “one flesh.” Their faith was also great in that Isaac had been obedient to follow Abraham to Mount Moriah for the binding.[11] Likewise, Rebekah had, without reservation, departed from her family to go to a land she had never seen (Genesis 24:12-65). In the story of both Abraham’s son and his daughter-in-law, we witness a proper model of what is expected to become one flesh, as had been modeled by Abraham and Sarah.

Equal Yoking

As we reflect on Chayei Sarah, we are reminded of the benefits and the blessings of equal yoking, especially in the marriage covenant. We see examples of how the faith and love of Abraham and Sarah established a pattern which eventually blessed their descendants throughout the generations. It is also critical to understand that as parents, they had the responsibility to live a life which allowed them to have input into the life choices of their son Isaac. This is a great pattern we should seek to emulate.

Do we take our responsibilities toward our children as seriously as Abraham and Sarah? Are we concerned about their long-term happiness and productivity in their relationship with the Lord? If we are, then we should be living a life pleasing to Him. By exhibiting such an example, as we approach the inevitable reality of death, we will be thankful that our lives mattered. We will be confident that our children will be able to pass on the blessings to their progeny we have imparted to them. Hopefully, we will better understand the blessings which the Psalmist says results from walking in His ways:

“Blessed is everyone who fears the LORD, who walks in his ways. For you will eat the labor of your hands. You will be happy, and it will be well with you. Your wife will be as a fruitful vine in the innermost parts of your house, your children like olive shoots around your table. Behold, this is how the man who fears the LORD is blessed. May the LORD bless you out of Zion, and may you see the good of Jerusalem all the days of your life. Yes, may you see your children’s children. Peace be upon Israel” (Psalm 128:1-6, WMB).

Here, the Psalmist said that one will be blessed to see their children’s children. But most importantly, as Believers in Israel’s Messiah, we should recognize how we will be blessed if we will be able to witness our children passing on the faith by which we lived our lives, to our grandchildren and others! As you approach death, we will understand that our lives and how we faithfully lived truly did matter.